Chic Murray is a Scottish comic legend that entertained people with his wicked one-liners that were razor sharp.
The Greenock-born comedian who was brought into the world in 1919 is considered to be one of the founding fathers of stand-up comedy.
Murray was an inspiration for the likes of Billy Connolly and also made an appearance in much-loved Scottish film Gregory's Girl as he played a Scottish secondary school headmaster.
Here are some of his finest jokes and one-liners.
Murray was an inspiration for the likes of Billy Connolly and also made an appearance in much-loved Scottish film Gregory's Girl as he played a Scottish secondary school headmaster.
5. Chic Murray on butchers
"I went to the butchers to buy a leg of lamb. “Is it Scotch?”, I asked. “Why?” the butcher said in reply. Are you going to talk to it or eat it?”. “In that case, have you got any wild duck?”. “No”, he responded, “but I’ve got one I could aggravate for you."
6. Chic Murray on pets
"My sister wanted a cat for a pet… I wanted a dog, so they bought a cat and taught it to bark."
7. Chic Murray on falling
"So there I was lying in the gutter. A man stopped and asked ‘”What’s the matter? Did you fall over?” So I said “No. I’ve a bar of toffee in my back pocket and I was just trying to break it.”
8. Chic Murray on the world
"It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to have to paint it."